6 teen weeks and counting

{September 12, 2011}   All eyes on me

My youngest child is going through the terrible three’s.  I know it’s supposed to be the terrible two’s and we did go through that one as well but the three’s are turning out to be harder than the two’s.  Every time I have to go run an errand while he is with me I cringe.  It never fails, as soon as we step foot into any kind of store he does fine for about 2 minutes and then there is some reason for him to go into a full blown meltdown.  And let me tell you, this kid’s screams could compete with a woman getting attack in an ally and AJ’s screaming would probably win.  So, it’s inevitable that all eyes focus on me and the screaming child.  I hate it.  I immediately feel my face get hot and of course my blood is already boiling because of whatever tension AJ and I are having at the moment so it suddenly feels about 100 degrees too warm for me.  Then I jump to the conclusion that everyone who is staring at me thinks I’m a horrible mother who has no control over her kids.  I feel like I am being judge by a room full of  Simon Cowell’s.  I wish I could just melt into the floor like the witch from the Wizard Of Oz.

What does help is if someone who is staring at me does one of two things:  Sympathizes with me:  “Oh, I’ve been there, hahaha” or comes over and starts talking to AJ.  I know most mom’s probably wouldn’t want someone to come over and start talking to their kid in the middle of this stressful situation but for me it helps.  It’s usually an older women that comes over and starts talking to my screaming child (I use to go through this with Mason too).  The screaming child stops screaming and stares at the lady like a deer in headlights.  Guess what?  The kid has been distracted from crying.  My temperature starts to return to normal.  Then the nice lady usually

reminisces about when she was a mother going through the same thing with her kids.  The color in my faces returns to normal.  Not only do I feel a lot better and AJ has stopped screaming, but I also feel at ease that the others who were staring at me were probably not passing judgement on me but remembering when they had to go through the same thing.  Sure, there are some out there without kids that have never been in the situation and are probably thinking exactly what I stated earlier but I try to not let it bother me and frankly, I’m glad that they don’t have kids.

So from this mother to all you shoppers out there, please don’t stare at the woman whose child is screaming bloody murder unless you flash a sympathetic smile or offer some words of encouragement.  The last thing she (or he, I don’t want to forget all the dads out there too!) needs to feel is that all eyes are on her.


Vanessa MC says:

Interesting I come across your blog at this time. My son will be three in March and I know exactly how you feel. I was stressed myself yesterday because he’s been doing the “No” thing when you tell him something to do or to discipline him. It does get very frustrating. I know what I do to make the situation a bit easier for me is to keep him occupied with something productive to do. I have him bring a beloved toy to use as a disciplinary tool and to occupy him, and I give him tasks to do while we are shopping to keep him busy. It doesnt always help but it is a good start.

Giving AJ tasks usually works, good point! I recently started doing this and for the most part things go more smoothly if he’s able to assist in the shopping. Thanks for the advice 🙂

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